In the News
Divorce leads mom to help others
Monday, June 19, 2006
By Kathy Spencer-Mention
kmention@greenvillenews.com
Tamekia Hunter-Tucker was depressed over the impending breakup of her marriage when her then 3-year-old son, Cameron, threw her a lifeline. Not even knowing why his mom was crying, he said, "'Mommy, it's OK. God will take care of us,'" says Hunter-Tucker, of Mauldin, in her new book, "Single Mothers Dispelling the Facts." In the book, Hunter-Tucker tells her own story and the story of 10 other single mothers of all of whom came into the role of single parent from various paths. They are divorcees, widows and women who became moms as teenagers, and all have survived the perils of life.
Hunter-Tucker courageously shares their stories not to minimize the hardships of parenting alone, she says, but to offer encouragement to others mom who, through various life circumstances, find themselves facing parenthood solo.
Single mothers repeatedly hear the dismal reports that children from fatherless homes comprise a majority of high school dropouts, substance abusers and juvenile offenders, she says.Society likes to label single mothers and their children, saying "we won't amount to anything," says Hunter-Tucker, a paralegal for The Cooper Law Firm in Greenville. Yet, there's "always a positive side to everything," she says.
With the right attitude, determination, a lot of faith and a strong support network, she says, you can change a bad situation, "regardless of how bad it looks." "Even though you're a single mother, you still can go to school, you still can work. A lot of times single mothers give up on their dreams, thinking there's not going to be a better life than this."
Having a strong support system at Valley Brook Outreach Baptist Church, she says, made all the difference in her ability to survive the years immediately after her divorce.
Hunter-Tucker is now training to become a licensed minister at her church, and is active in the Women-of-Virtue Choir and the Women of Worship Dance Ministry there.
Her book, she says, is part of a new ministry she founded called Mom and Me Ministries LLC, which she hopes will help single mothers provide a similar support network for one another.
It's for single mothers who say, "'I want more out of life than my current situation. How do I get from here to where I need to be?'"
The ministry will include a single mother's fellowship and, eventually, a mentoring program for moms, a mentoring program for children and a ministry for single moms in prison.
Hunter-Tucker says she initially amassed a mountain of debt trying to live on credit as a single mom. She has organized a free financial counseling seminar from 2 to 5 p.m. July 1 in the TRC Auditorium at Greenville Tech's Barton Campus. Featured speaker is Robert H. Cooper of the Cooper Law Firm, Hunter-Tucker's employer and event sponsor.
Her bad financial decisions, she says, reflected just how unprepared she was for life after divorce. "It happened unexpectedly. Yet it helped me to always be prepared, to always be on your guard because you just never know. And life still goes on, regardless."